Swallowing My Anger or How I Learned Not to Turn Into A Giant Green Angry Guy (Please Don't Sue Me Marvel, I Have Nothing)
Sometimes my depression goes sideways and becomes anger. It usually happens when I'm already in a depressive state and something triggers it. It can be a piece of bad luck, like a missed opportunity at work, an unexpected car repair or an unexpected home repair. Some other defeat, which my life seems to rife with and I become irate. I'm not in a huff. I'm not pissed off. I'm irate.I want to smash things. I want to punch holes in the wall. I want to yell at people for being stupid, and I can yell really loud thanks to the "yard voice" I developed working in a prison. I want to go berserk. I sometimes joke that my life would be a lot simpler and both mentally and physically healthier if viking was still a viable career choice. Because you see, my own anger terrifies me. I'm a big dude I'm 6'8" and weigh nearly 400 pounds. Little bits of it have slipped out on rare occasions. I once smashed a bookcase ...